HOW much “imaginative†science can be crammed into two sentences? Jane Griffith-Ward directs us to a promising candidate: “Timmy [the Energy Bear] has been developed to re-energise the ‘dead’ atmosphere in centrally heated indoor rooms – effectively bringing the natural elements from fresh air – inside! Combining gentle magnetic fields in his tummy, with natural daylight energy in the form of photon platinum fabric, Timmy helps to neutralise electrical smog…â€
So, according to the advert for Timmy at (pdf format), he can mess with the chemistry and electromagnetic fields of your child’s bedroom – using only natural means, of course. We presume that the “photon platinum fabric†sported by Timmy – who, by the way, was “born in the stars and rode to England on a moonbeam†– is hand-spun from real, natural sunbeams, though the price of �29.99 makes us wonder how much real, natural platinum is involved.
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Neither are we sure about the claim of “encouraging restful sleepâ€, given the announcement that Timmy is “a delightful cuddly, soft toy who is literally ‘alive'â€. Have they never seen the horror movies about that kind of thing?
SHOULD we give Microsoft’s Windows Vista operating system a try? Or should we not? That is the question we’ve been mulling over since its launch earlier this year.
“At Manchester Piccadilly station in the UK, Don Wycherley spotted a large, very solid door bearing the easy-to-obey instruction: “Do not enter when closedâ€â€
Vista has special requirements, so software companies have been forced to develop special “Vista-ready†versions of their programs. AOL has released a free Vista-ready version of its email and internet software, so we gave it a go.
In the UK, AOL had previously hired the actress Joanna Lumley – best known for her roles in the cult TV series The New Avengers and Absolutely Fabulous – to say “Helloâ€, “You’ve got Mail†and “Goodbye†in her inimitable posh-but-sultry English intonation. The new Vista-ready version has replaced Ms Lumley with someone who sounds like he’s advertising used cars on a radio station in Hicksville, USA.
Searching for a setting that would silence this horrid intrusion, we were rewarded with a big yellow exclamation mark and the bewildering instruction: “Form GID: 44-33806 is Missing! Please File a Bug! OK.â€
No, it’s not OK, but thanks anyway, AOL. You’ve given us a very clear sign that we are not yet ready for Vista.
WHEN Victoria Petherick-Brian emailed us to say that she had until recently kept a label from a bottle of Perrier carbonated natural spring water that listed the ingredients as “Sodium…2.3mg/200ml, Potassium…0.3mg/200ml. Sodium freeâ€, we thought we ought to check that the label really says this. None of the Perrier bottles we found had these words on them, so we emailed Petherick-Brian, asking if she was quite sure. Here is her reply:
“I’ve just been to the supermarket myself to check on this. The current Perrier labels are a new design and no longer say this. Nonetheless, I am absolutely certain they used to until recently as I still have the section of label which I personally peeled off a Perrier bottle, and which clearly shows this information. And thanks to Google, I have found a Peter J. Farrel who noticed the same thing but, unlike me, had the foresight to save and scan a whole label.â€
You can see not only the scan of the controversial label, but also a very extensive discussion of its meaning, significance and legal status at .
Never let it be said that Feedback does not deal with the significant issues of the day.
WHERE do you look for inspiration if you want to invent a trade name? The Newport Corporation’s recent introduction of its “state-of-the-art high power picosecond Pantera(TM) laser†piqued our attention. No doubt it’s a pretty cool laser, and in Spanish the name means “panther†– but Pantera is better known to many as an extremely angry heavy-metal band that spent two decades beating on their audiences’ ear drums. Is there a heavy metal fan trapped in the Newport Corporation marketing department?
ENJOYMENT of a programme on cable TV was interrupted for James Howlett by a large message box covering most of the screen. It announced: “You are receiving an update to your service. The Remote Control will not work for a few moments. To clear this message please press OK on the remote.â€
FINALLY, when Dawn Gordon was researching the retention rate of students in universities, she stumbled on an article entitled “Implementing a complete control curriculum in the classroomâ€. This could be the gem that the world’s teachers have been waiting for, she thought. It turned out, sadly for some, to be about teaching “complete control†in engineering.
