麻豆传媒

Feedback is our weekly column of bizarre stories, implausible advertising claims, confusing instructions and more

Einstein didn鈥檛 say that

ALBERT EINSTEIN鈥橲 name appears to be a magical talisman on internet quotations, we have noted (6 September). Our request for examples of it being taken in vain produced an enthusiastic, if disgruntled, response from you.

Brigitte Pflueger is delighted that her latest DVD purchase includes 鈥淓nglish subtitles for the death and hard of hearing鈥� 鈥� that鈥檒l help pass the time, when the time comes

A bee quote for the birds

ONE of the more egregious misquotations of recent years is: 鈥淚f the bee disappeared off the face of the Earth, Man would have only four years left to live 鈥� Albert Einstein.鈥� Grant Hutchison wonders whether 鈥渁nyone has ever read this quote without thinking, 鈥楤ees? Einstein? Why?'鈥� He alerts us to on the website , which contends that the original perpetuator of the misquote may have confused Einstein with Charles Darwin and the Belgian playwright Maurice Maeterlinck. An easy mistake to make.

Much though Feedback appreciates bees and efforts to save them, surely people who care about accuracy are part of the constituency for that campaign?

Does Einstein play dice?

GOD, Einstein said, 鈥渄oes not play dice with the universe鈥�. This publication has several times as a handy illustration of doubts about quantum mechanics. But did he say quite that? Robert Jenkins writes that in a on 12 December 1926 Einstein wrote: 鈥淨uantum mechanics is certainly imposing. But an inner voice tells me that it is not yet the real thing. The theory says a lot, but does not really bring us any closer to the secret of the Old One. I, at any rate, am convinced that He does not throw dice.鈥�

You know that Einstein equation鈥�

WITH even more concern for precision 鈥� or 鈥渂eing pedantic鈥�, as he puts it 鈥� Phil Cutmore asks whether Einstein actually used the equation E = mc². In brief, in his 1905 paper content?鈥� he used different symbols for energy and the speed of light, that m = L/V².

Can words programme energy?

THESE days, false Einstein quotes are finding homes as endorsements for fruitloop candidates. Pennie Quinton recently attended a free course that was billed as helping participants 鈥渄efine your vision by creating clear goals鈥�. When the PowerPoint presentation flashed up 鈥淓verything is down to energy and we can programme our energy with words 鈥� Albert Einstein鈥� it rather strengthened her suspicion that this was in fact a pitch for further, expensive courses in what is called Neuro-Linguistic Programming.

Albert Einstein鈥檚 200 motels

SIMILARLY, Don Jewett doubted whether the great physicist said 鈥淚nformation is not knowledge鈥�. He therefore tracked this quote down 鈥� to the great creative noise merchant Frank Zappa.

Relatively, this is false

CAN we be sure Uncle Albert failed to say all of these things? Hans Martens points out that 鈥淣obody can falsify my statement 鈥楨instein often said: Drinking a decent bottle of red wine will help everybody to understand general relativity,鈥� and Bertrand Russell鈥檚 celestial teapot illustrates the problem.鈥� He refers to Russell鈥檚 assertion that being unable to disprove a teapot orbiting the sun is not grounds for believing one does.

What do we call this, then?

WHAT, though, are we to call the act or phenomenon of taking Einstein鈥檚 name in vain? We provisionally named it 鈥済eneral errortivity鈥� and asked for further suggestions.

We received five nominations for 鈥淣einstein鈥� and two for 鈥淜einstein鈥�, which we find a slightly more elegant piece of made-up German, kein meaning 鈥渘o鈥� as in 鈥渘one鈥�. Conrad Lawrence further proposes 鈥渢he word 鈥楰leinstein鈥� to describe something that is a little Einstein鈥�.

Spooky attribution at a distance

LIMITING ourselves to the dialect of German called 鈥淓nglish鈥�, we come to Pat Fox-Roberts鈥檚 suggestion that Einstein misquotations should be referred to as 鈥渟pooky attribution at a distance鈥�. Jack Hampson, inspired by the Latinate words 鈥渕alapropism鈥� and 鈥渕alware鈥�, comes up with the rather beautiful 鈥渕albert鈥�.

Is this paragraph also false?

FEEDBACK has already celebrated Hinchliffe鈥檚 Rule: 鈥渨henever the title of a paper is a question with a yes/no answer, the answer is always no鈥� (16 August). Recently we found a striking, if not ultimate, example on the front page of 鈥� 鈥淢eteor strikes: are we ready?鈥� The article was not, we should add, about the psychology of calm resignation to unpredictable but unavoidable unpleasantness.

Grim reapers of bank accounts

FINALLY, a colleague has received a grimly opportunistic version of the 鈥�419 scam鈥� seeking to recruit a stooge allegedly to empty someone else鈥檚 bank account 鈥� but in fact to have theirs drained. 鈥淎 client of mine who died of the EBOLA virus deposited a huge amount of money in a bank,鈥� it begins enticingly, before continuing 鈥渉ere in the NIGERIA, but i don鈥檛 know how much. He is a Liberian Citizen, so i want you to stand in as his next of kin so that the whole fund will be yours.鈥�

A web search confirms that this is a widely spreading outbreak. Could the way these thing spread teach us anything about the epidemiology of real horrors?