Feedback is our weekly column of bizarre stories, implausible advertising claims, confusing instructions and more
Nice slice of fried man, Sir?
NEWS reaches Feedback of a grim, cold first Monday back at university, and a class introducing humanities graduate students to statistics. Our informant was distracted by her neighbour snacking on McCoy’s crisps – and especially by the prominent legend on the packet: “MAN CRISPS”.
Could this snack actually be deep-fried slices of man? If so, isn’t there some sort of prior art claim from heirs of Mrs Lovett, proprietor of the pie shop supplied by demon barber ? If the classmate wasn’t munching on crispy fried slithers of male human, isn’t there a trade descriptions issue here? And does the manufacturer have balancing plans for “woman crisps”, or “dolphin crisps” for that matter?
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The UK Post Office is pushing life insurance – by email, to John Whittle, dated 16 December 2014, offering special terms if he applies before 10 January 2014
Sex-specific snack suspicion
IN THE same vein as the above, it was purely for research purposes that Feedback purchased a packet that yelled at us that the chocolate buttons therein were “MAN SIZE”. An image of a brown disc labelled “actual size” is accompanied by another image of a tape-measure, showing it to be 42 millimetres in diameter (and 5 millimetres thick) – shorter and more slender than most men.
Is there evidence that men are resistant to purchasing snacks unless encouraged by such confusing slogans? If so, research into health-promotion messages that take advantage of this must urgently be funded. “Real men don’t get the munchies,” perhaps?
When ads break the law
FED UP with advertising slogans that break the law, especially the laws of physics? Benjamin Careathers, David Wolf and Miguel Almaraz, a bunch of enterprising consumers in the US, were. On seeing the slogan “Red Bull gives you wings” they each thought “oh no it doesn’t” and brought class action lawsuits against the makers of the energy drink.
As a result, if you are a resident of the US and bought one or more cans of the products in question in that country between 1 January 2002 and 3 October 2014, you can go to and claim a share of $13 million.
In case you’ve forgotten since the settlement proposal was announced in October, Feedback reminds you that your deadline is 2 March, unless you want to object to the settlement or to opt out – which generally leaves you the option of suing separately – by 1 April. Lawyers for negotiating the proposal, in which the manufacturers do not admit any wrongdoing or liability.
Getting water from petrol
THIRST is best quenched with water. This is, we have observed recently, hard to find in the desert (25 October 2014). We reported Roger Riordan’s recollection of hearing at school in 1944 that German scientists had invented dehydrated water, reconstituted with petrol.
Kristen McAteer reminded us how to get water from petrol. Her grandfather, who served in the war that was raging at the time, instructed her thus: suspend a small metal pail over a larger bucket. Fill the small pail with petrol, “being extremely careful not to allow the tiniest scrid to drip onto the outside or into the larger bucket”.
As the fuel evaporates and chills the pail, water condenses on the outside and drips down.
Richard Kerr mentions condensing the water formed when petrol is burned. Karen Page announces that she has “some dehydrated water on my dining table right now, next to the pepper. It used to be sea water.”
Professor Twerp’s discoveries
WE MAY have the origin of the above-mentioned story from Roger Riordan in a recollection by George Featherston. The 1960s British television series All our Yesterdays re-ran newsreels from the 1940s. George recalls one proclaiming “new British weapons”, including an anti-searchlight to black out the moon, credited to “Professor Twerp, inventor of dehydrated water”.
The irony has got its hat on
FOR several months Feedback has suffered anxiety on seeing the phrase “veteran BBC DJ”. Now we venture to mention the case of one who in May 2014 after playing an 80-year-old recording of Ambrose & His Orchestra performing The Sun Has Got his Hat On, a novelty song with lyrics that unfortunately contain the racist “n word”.
The word can be heard more clearly in a version of the song recorded in 1932 by Syd Lipton and his Grosvenor House Band. This was restored for re-release in a series of CDs, The Classic Years in Digital Stereo, by Australian sound engineer Robert Parker. To get rid of the hissy background noise Parker captured noise from a “silent” passage and subtracted it from the music. was released on the BBC Records label.
An easily-resisted offer
FINALLY, lawyers in the energy drink case mentioned above may be planning a celebratory outing. They probably won’t be taking the trip to Eastbourne, a seaside resort in the UK, advertised in the cutting that G. Izzard sends. The small print specifies: “All prices are based on 40+ passengers and two adults sharing a twin/double room.”