
Ever had the sense that everyone else is an idiot? Maybe thatās a tad overblown, but when it comes to smarts, looks, charisma and general psychological adjustment, thereās no denying you are a cut above the average person in the street. Or on the road: have you seen how those jerks drive?
Well, hereās the bad news. Pretty much everyone else is thinking the same thing.
The phenomenon of self-enhancement ā viewing ourselves as above average ā , professions and , and to capabilities from driving to playing chess. It does have advantages. People who are more impressed with themselves tend to make better first impressions, be generally happier and may even . High self-estimation : anthropologist , argues that when weāve tricked ourselves, we donāt have to work so hard to trick others, too.
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Confidence also helps in finding a romantic partner, and so in reproduction. When it comes to overestimating our looks, weāre all at it ā although men are on average worse offenders than women. According to a study earlier this year by Marcel Yoder of the University of Illinois in Springfield and his colleagues, : they accurately assess other peopleās lesser perception of them, while persisting in a more positive perception of themselves.
āMen have a āfrog princeā delusion: persisting in a positive self-perceptionā
The real downsides come when youāre less aware of how others perceive you. If you are self-confident without being self-aware, you are likely to be seen as a jerk. āItās hard to come off as humble or modest when youāre clueless about how other people see you,ā says Yoder. Plus we may make bad decisions on the basis of an inflated sense of expertise or understanding.
Particularly in the political arena, our ābias blind spotā ā a belief that our world view is based on objective truth, while everyone else is a deluded fool ā , especially as the echo chamber of social media exposes us to fewer contrary views. āIt can make opposing parties feel that the other side is too irrational to be reasoned with,ā says , who studies communication at Washington State University in Pullman.
So how can we preserve the good while avoiding the downsides? Different strategies and training programmes do exist for overcoming our inbuilt biases. Most begin by simply making people aware of them and how they can affect our decision-making.
At home, we can use an exercise that psychologists call āperspective-takingā. This amounts to trying to see a dispute from the other personās point of view, says , who studies decision-making at City University of London. She also points out that acting when youāre all riled up ā in a state of high emotion ā only entrenches your bias. āWe know how to make unbiased decisions, but often emotion pushes us, or we arenāt willing to put in the effort,ā she says. But then comes the good news: āpractice can make us better.ā
This article appeared in print under the headline āYou are⦠a fantasistā